Female Orgasm 1

"I am the sinner - I am a saint".
I miss the way you enthusiastically exclaim: “yes yes yes”.
I love it when you command me with a hint of begging: “sleep with me”. Such gentleness and yet powerful beyond resistance.

I miss you in every cell of my body, my whole being. My body hungers for you. My soul aches for you. My heart pines for you. I long for you, for your electrifying touch, that sends shivers down my spine and my head spinning. The thought of you gets me wet and the heart beat quickens.

All I can do is let you go. Seeing myself standing there letting you be taken away by your wife, watching you disappear, driven away like a prisoner. Yet you are free to do whatever you want. Is this what you truly want?

Last night you came to me in a dream. I offered you my breasts to suck on, my body was hungry for you. I woke up and could feel your hand on me. Your Cobra shaped Vajra (Penis, Diamond, Magic Wand of Light) deep inside, still and filling me up with energy.

The surge of energy was so strong. I consciously decided to get my vibrators out after months of not using them. I didn’t even remember where I put them since the cruise. I wanted a quick relief. I wanted to get your imprint out of my system. the vibrator did not satisfy me, there was no life, no energy. Tossing the vibrator aside. I laid there crying, my body hungry for you.

Suddenly the surges of energy came washing through me, lapping into me, like strong waves crashing onto the shore. Again and again, taking over my whole body, I ejaculated, (female ejaculation), hot and refreshing at the same time, opening up the sacred well.

Orgasms emanating deep in my sacred Yoni (Vulva, Pussy, Tomb, Sacred Source of All, the "Yoniverse") and surging upwards, igniting all parts of my being, Chakras (energy centres in the body) bursting into spontaneous supernova.

I felt you deep again, penetrating me. My heart is beating fast as I write this, re-living it. I could feel my body going into orgasmic spasms. I realised my body was moving as if you where there, penetrating me, possessing me, and I surrendered to it, opening myself deeper. I let out a deep loud and heart felt cry, one that was overdue since you left, and sobbed in release. Sex with you is a divine communion.

After a while, I sat up to do my breathing meditation practices. Barely taken the second breath, I was overwhelmed by the surge of orgasms coming again. I let out a deep moan and my body shuddered. Every breath was a struggle to keep sitting upright, having huge orgasms shaking the core of my being. I was moving as if I was a charmed snake moving, hypnotised by Divine music.

Ironically, this happened immediately after I've made the decision, determined to let you go. As if you were penetrating me, showing me your strength, saying:"take it all in, do not forget what I am to you". You are The Lover, The Beloved. And there was my husband, my children and your wife.

"I am not the mind
I am not the body
I am not the emotions
I am everything
I am nothing
I am supreme consciousness
I am the sinner
I am a saint
I am supreme consciousness."
Aum Namah Shivaya, Om Namah Shiva
Translation from the Buddhist text.